1 00:00:04,180 --> 00:00:05,440 Wait, wait, wait. I'm not done. 2 00:00:06,640 --> 00:00:08,140 Why don't you buy your own newspaper? 3 00:00:08,960 --> 00:00:11,800 I don't want to get that poisonous ink all over my hands while I'm eating 4 00:00:13,380 --> 00:00:14,380 Yeah, you're right. 5 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:22,060 Thank you. 6 00:00:23,540 --> 00:00:26,880 Hey, the gang's all here. Come on, I'll introduce you. Oh, I have to make a 7 00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:28,440 quick phone call first. Over there. 8 00:00:30,380 --> 00:00:31,380 Hey, guys. 9 00:00:31,530 --> 00:00:32,489 Hi, Harry. 10 00:00:32,490 --> 00:00:35,130 So, Harry, who's that with the great sweater meat? 11 00:00:36,770 --> 00:00:40,350 Her name's Pamela Hammond. She's a reporter doing an article on our court. 12 00:00:40,350 --> 00:00:41,630 told her we'd help her in any way we could. 13 00:00:42,190 --> 00:00:44,270 I'm thinking about a half dozen ways right now. 14 00:00:46,610 --> 00:00:49,730 She happens to be a very intelligent and successful woman. 15 00:00:50,270 --> 00:00:53,110 Well, it's nice to know that there's someone around who is man enough to 16 00:00:53,110 --> 00:00:54,110 women with respect. 17 00:00:54,410 --> 00:00:57,070 Oh, please. You two have the sex drive of Ken and Barbie. 18 00:01:03,020 --> 00:01:06,120 If anybody knows about having sex with plastic people, it's you. 19 00:01:11,540 --> 00:01:12,660 Hey, Pamela. 20 00:01:12,920 --> 00:01:16,540 This is... Dan Fielding. And several people you really don't have to worry 21 00:01:16,540 --> 00:01:17,540 about. 22 00:01:18,040 --> 00:01:22,260 We'll go by the names of Christine Sullivan, Roz Russell, and Mac Ross. 23 00:01:22,660 --> 00:01:24,460 Judge Stone has told me all about you. 24 00:01:24,860 --> 00:01:25,960 Too bad, Dan. 25 00:01:28,520 --> 00:01:31,440 I've been telling Pam that in a high -stress job like ours, it's important to 26 00:01:31,440 --> 00:01:33,700 have competent people around to make things easier. 27 00:01:34,020 --> 00:01:35,020 Hi, guys. 28 00:01:40,540 --> 00:01:41,540 Oh, 29 00:01:41,860 --> 00:01:42,658 no, Your Honor. 30 00:01:42,660 --> 00:01:45,320 I'm just having one of those dreams where you show up to work in your 31 00:01:47,600 --> 00:01:49,060 This isn't a dream, Bo. 32 00:02:43,390 --> 00:02:46,910 Pamela, I thought maybe I'd like to take this opportunity to give you a little 33 00:02:46,910 --> 00:02:49,070 background information on myself for your article. 34 00:02:49,430 --> 00:02:52,410 Dan, I should tell you the focus of my story is on Judge Stone. 35 00:02:52,930 --> 00:02:53,930 I see. 36 00:02:53,970 --> 00:02:55,630 So it's going to be a short piece. 37 00:02:58,730 --> 00:03:03,110 However, in the unlikely event your name should come up, I'll make every effort 38 00:03:03,110 --> 00:03:04,110 to see it spelled correctly. 39 00:03:06,590 --> 00:03:07,590 You're abusive. 40 00:03:07,750 --> 00:03:08,750 I like that. 41 00:03:11,700 --> 00:03:13,100 Au revoir, mon chéri. 42 00:03:15,800 --> 00:03:18,680 Ah, Pamela, I think that I should warn you. 43 00:03:19,160 --> 00:03:20,980 Dan is not what he seems to be. 44 00:03:21,300 --> 00:03:24,400 He seems to be the kind of guy who would hit on anything in his skirt. 45 00:03:25,680 --> 00:03:27,180 All right, then he is what he seems to be. 46 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:32,460 Hey, Matt, hit me with your best shot. Yes, sir. Call People vs. 47 00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:33,760 the Conkle Brothers. 48 00:03:46,510 --> 00:03:47,510 to you, too. 49 00:03:48,630 --> 00:03:52,450 Prosecutor? Yes, sir. The defendant is charged with juggling flaming shish 50 00:03:52,450 --> 00:03:54,070 kebabs on the street without a license. 51 00:03:54,950 --> 00:03:56,890 I hope that law doesn't apply to kielbasa. 52 00:03:59,750 --> 00:04:03,350 Miss Sullivan, how do your clients intend to plead to this illegal use of a 53 00:04:03,350 --> 00:04:04,450 Slavic meat dish? 54 00:04:06,070 --> 00:04:08,430 They claim diplomatic immunity, sir. Huh? 55 00:04:08,770 --> 00:04:11,830 Well, according to their passports, they are exiled royalty from Buldavia. 56 00:04:12,430 --> 00:04:15,890 I am Prince Havel, and these are my brothers, Prince Bled. 57 00:04:16,649 --> 00:04:17,649 And Prince Poopa. 58 00:04:22,410 --> 00:04:24,090 Guys mind hoeing downwind? 59 00:04:27,030 --> 00:04:31,190 I'm sure I learned this in the sixth grade, but where the heck is Baldavia? 60 00:04:31,490 --> 00:04:34,470 It's half an alp on the rear end of Yugoslavia, sir. 61 00:04:35,310 --> 00:04:36,990 Principally known for being unknown. 62 00:04:37,530 --> 00:04:42,030 But we will fix that by becoming big stars on that Sullivan show. 63 00:04:42,510 --> 00:04:44,530 Just like beetles and red buttons. 64 00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:52,980 I hate to break this to you, but Ed Sullivan is dead. 65 00:04:54,020 --> 00:04:55,280 Eddie Kroplotsky? 66 00:04:58,060 --> 00:05:00,100 Now how can we raise dollars for the revolution? 67 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:01,800 Who's revolting? 68 00:05:02,100 --> 00:05:03,400 I'll give you three hints. 69 00:05:07,500 --> 00:05:09,420 Mac, this sounds like a job for the State Department. 70 00:05:09,660 --> 00:05:12,500 I'm already on the phone, sir. Well, hold over the case until then. 71 00:05:12,840 --> 00:05:15,840 Roz, Bull, would you please keep an eye on their hoinesses here? 72 00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:19,200 Let's go, fellas. 73 00:05:20,140 --> 00:05:23,840 I will never tell you, you big, beautiful woman who bounces when she 74 00:05:25,060 --> 00:05:26,280 Nobody who lived. 75 00:05:29,300 --> 00:05:30,940 And let's take lunch, people. 76 00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:34,680 Miss Hammond, if you like, we can continue our discussion in my office. 77 00:05:35,860 --> 00:05:39,620 Pamela, I didn't want you to get me wrong. I mean, Harry is well worth 78 00:05:39,620 --> 00:05:43,360 about. I mean, there's a reason he's called the Jerry Lewis of jurisprudence. 79 00:05:43,360 --> 00:05:46,860 just thought before you commit yourself, you'd like to talk to some of my co 80 00:05:46,860 --> 00:05:49,220 -workers and find out about the real me. 81 00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:55,040 Oh, I already have, Dan. In fact, several secretaries mention that you dye 82 00:05:55,040 --> 00:05:56,040 chest hairs. 83 00:05:58,820 --> 00:05:59,900 I do not. 84 00:06:01,260 --> 00:06:02,260 It's just a rinse. 85 00:06:20,110 --> 00:06:21,690 up before you start sweating on it. 86 00:06:22,890 --> 00:06:25,230 You have it backwards, my large bald friend. 87 00:06:25,530 --> 00:06:27,450 We juggle to pay for food. 88 00:06:27,810 --> 00:06:30,730 Oh, gee, fellas, we don't do it that way here. You need money. 89 00:06:31,530 --> 00:06:32,530 But we have none. 90 00:06:32,990 --> 00:06:35,870 We will starve to death like rats with gum disease. 91 00:06:37,370 --> 00:06:42,150 But who needs food when we can pig out on the beauty of the siren of the 92 00:06:42,150 --> 00:06:43,150 slammer? 93 00:06:45,430 --> 00:06:47,550 May we sit here and hit on you? 94 00:06:49,870 --> 00:06:50,870 As long as I can hit back. 95 00:06:54,050 --> 00:06:57,810 So how do you answer those who say that your magic tricks diminish the court's 96 00:06:57,810 --> 00:07:02,810 dignity? Oh, well, my reputation as a trickster is really over -exaggerated. 97 00:07:02,810 --> 00:07:05,570 fact of the matter is, I hardly ever do those things anymore. 98 00:07:05,890 --> 00:07:09,230 Oh, that's a shame. I was really hoping to see you do a trick. 99 00:07:09,530 --> 00:07:10,670 Oh, well, in that case... 100 00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:18,600 Yeah, I figure if I can lighten the load of some guy on his way to the big 101 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:20,000 house, why the heck not, huh? 102 00:07:21,560 --> 00:07:22,900 Oh, I'm out of tape. 103 00:07:23,480 --> 00:07:24,480 Excuse me a minute. 104 00:07:26,740 --> 00:07:27,760 Harry Stone background? 105 00:07:28,900 --> 00:07:31,660 Harry Stone in court? All these tapes are about moi? 106 00:07:32,020 --> 00:07:33,580 No, I believe in doing my homework. 107 00:07:34,480 --> 00:07:36,020 Harry, we have to talk. Oh! 108 00:07:36,760 --> 00:07:38,860 I mean, Hammond, I forgot you were in here. 109 00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:41,000 What is it, Dan? 110 00:07:41,240 --> 00:07:44,320 We have to go over this Ferguson case right away, sir. You know, it's 111 00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:47,460 that Judge Stone and I are in sync so we can give the matter all the attention 112 00:07:47,460 --> 00:07:48,419 it deserves. 113 00:07:48,420 --> 00:07:50,520 Dan, this is an ordinary flasher case. 114 00:07:50,860 --> 00:07:51,960 Well, then it's open and shut. 115 00:07:54,300 --> 00:07:59,840 I can't tell you how proud it makes me to serve justice. I could elaborate on 116 00:07:59,840 --> 00:08:01,080 this over dinner. 117 00:08:01,640 --> 00:08:03,660 That won't be necessary, Mr. Fielding. 118 00:08:04,080 --> 00:08:06,700 Uh, sir, sir, I need you to sign these warrants again. 119 00:08:07,060 --> 00:08:10,860 Oh, gee, Mac, why can't we get this done right the first time? Because you 120 00:08:10,860 --> 00:08:12,680 signed them with disappearing ink. 121 00:08:14,780 --> 00:08:18,220 Look, Harry, why don't you take care of that? I need to make a few phone calls, 122 00:08:18,240 --> 00:08:19,119 and I'll be right back. 123 00:08:19,120 --> 00:08:20,120 See you then. 124 00:08:20,780 --> 00:08:21,780 Hey, what's this? 125 00:08:22,020 --> 00:08:23,760 Judge Stone, tape three. 126 00:08:24,140 --> 00:08:25,520 That's Pamela's research on me. 127 00:08:26,500 --> 00:08:27,500 Really? 128 00:08:28,020 --> 00:08:30,860 Why don't we see what she had to say about it? Hey, I wouldn't do that. 129 00:08:30,860 --> 00:08:31,860 private property. 130 00:08:32,080 --> 00:08:35,200 All right, fine, fine, fine. We'll just put it in here for safekeeping. We won't 131 00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:36,200 listen to it, okay? 132 00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:37,720 Spider! 133 00:08:39,659 --> 00:08:42,440 Some are offended by Judge Stone's unorthodox style. 134 00:08:42,700 --> 00:08:45,280 Dan! But there's no question of his qualifications. 135 00:08:45,800 --> 00:08:47,140 Dan, turn that off now! 136 00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:51,780 If only I weren't so shy, I'd tell him how much I love him. 137 00:08:53,300 --> 00:08:54,300 Touch it and die. 138 00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:24,480 under her skin, huh? 139 00:09:29,060 --> 00:09:31,860 You would have thought the woman was so shy. 140 00:09:32,300 --> 00:09:33,300 And blind. 141 00:09:34,880 --> 00:09:39,580 Wait a minute, I got it. I know why she likes you, because you're safe. The same 142 00:09:39,580 --> 00:09:41,760 reason women love puppies and George Burns. 143 00:09:43,420 --> 00:09:46,880 Well, it is true that some women look for men that are non -threatening. 144 00:09:47,300 --> 00:09:51,700 Hey, you guys can rationalize it however you like, but that doesn't change one 145 00:09:51,700 --> 00:09:54,020 thing. She wants me. 146 00:09:54,340 --> 00:09:55,640 Harry, I don't want to hear this. 147 00:09:55,900 --> 00:09:57,580 Allow me to summarize. 148 00:09:58,220 --> 00:10:03,500 While you're in your office putting together your naughty nurse jigsaw 149 00:10:03,780 --> 00:10:10,460 I'm going to be here entertaining Pamela with the lights down and the 150 00:10:10,460 --> 00:10:12,280 music up. 151 00:10:13,020 --> 00:10:17,780 Because that's what the woman wants. 152 00:10:27,850 --> 00:10:30,450 Oh, I'm so sorry. Let me get this. No, please. It's the least I can do. 153 00:10:32,190 --> 00:10:36,270 Jessica Carrington, are you a fan of this, too? Oh, I know, I know, I know. I 154 00:10:36,270 --> 00:10:39,090 don't like people knowing that I read romance novels, either. But between you 155 00:10:39,090 --> 00:10:40,530 and me, I think she is terrific. 156 00:10:41,190 --> 00:10:43,890 Ooh, passion plundered. Where'd you get this one? I've never seen it. 157 00:10:44,450 --> 00:10:45,450 Can you keep a secret? 158 00:10:45,830 --> 00:10:49,010 Yeah. I wrote it. Jessica Carrington's my pen name. 159 00:10:49,410 --> 00:10:50,910 You're Jessica Carrington! 160 00:10:54,290 --> 00:10:55,850 Why, Miss Carrington, it's a small world. 161 00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:57,800 Come on, here, I want to talk to you. 162 00:10:59,500 --> 00:11:02,440 I'm sorry, I just can't believe I'm talking to Jessica Carrington. 163 00:11:03,340 --> 00:11:06,880 My God, where do you find the time to be a reporter and a novelist? Well, I 164 00:11:06,880 --> 00:11:09,400 dictate in my spare time, and then I have it transcribed. 165 00:11:10,420 --> 00:11:11,780 Why are we being so secretive? 166 00:11:13,480 --> 00:11:17,260 You see, the books pay fine bills, but if anybody found out that I wrote them, 167 00:11:17,340 --> 00:11:19,520 it would hurt my reputation as a serious journalist. 168 00:11:19,860 --> 00:11:23,200 Ah, oh, of course, I perfectly understand. I mean, books can't be taken 169 00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:24,520 seriously. They're just a mild diversion. 170 00:11:25,800 --> 00:11:27,400 Angeline's going to be captured by terrorists again. 171 00:11:29,500 --> 00:11:33,420 Oh, look at me. You must think I'm such a silly goof. Not at all. I'm flattered 172 00:11:33,420 --> 00:11:34,399 that you like them. 173 00:11:34,400 --> 00:11:36,940 Well, it's just that your characters are so real to me. 174 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:40,040 I can tell. You and I have a lot in common. 175 00:11:40,340 --> 00:11:41,560 Really? Yeah, absolutely. 176 00:11:41,900 --> 00:11:44,900 I mean, I think only a woman knows what another woman really feels. 177 00:11:45,180 --> 00:11:48,840 I mean, let's face it. A man would have no idea how to write something like 178 00:11:48,840 --> 00:11:52,920 this. That's so true. I mean, most men I know aren't exactly what I would call 179 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:54,740 sensitive. Isn't that the truth? 180 00:11:55,260 --> 00:11:57,240 I think that's why I prefer the company of women. 181 00:11:57,700 --> 00:12:01,320 You know, I don't blame you. I mean, women are so much more considerate. 182 00:12:02,360 --> 00:12:03,360 Scratch in public. 183 00:12:04,020 --> 00:12:06,700 No, I mean, I really prefer women. 184 00:12:10,660 --> 00:12:11,660 Oh. 185 00:12:17,100 --> 00:12:20,400 Maybe if you'd like, later on we can get together and have a drink and talk. 186 00:12:21,780 --> 00:12:23,300 Well, uh, that... 187 00:12:23,870 --> 00:12:27,130 Certainly sounds like fun, but fortunately, 188 00:12:27,970 --> 00:12:31,650 I am so busy. You wouldn't believe the amount of work I had to do. I mean, 189 00:12:31,670 --> 00:12:33,490 there's so many cases that come through here. 190 00:12:34,650 --> 00:12:36,210 Boy, is that slippery paper. 191 00:12:39,090 --> 00:12:40,490 Christine, I apologize. 192 00:12:40,970 --> 00:12:42,930 I've obviously made you feel very uncomfortable. 193 00:12:43,870 --> 00:12:45,790 Uncomfortable? Oh, me? No, no, no. 194 00:12:46,310 --> 00:12:50,450 Oh, please. I mean, it's no big deal. I mean, some women prefer men, and some 195 00:12:50,450 --> 00:12:51,450 women prefer... 196 00:12:51,950 --> 00:12:52,950 Non -men. 197 00:12:55,590 --> 00:13:00,610 Exactly. I mean, it makes no difference to me that you're, you know... A 198 00:13:00,610 --> 00:13:01,610 lesbian? Yes. 199 00:13:02,110 --> 00:13:04,330 I hope you're not offended by the word. 200 00:13:05,010 --> 00:13:06,170 You didn't say it. 201 00:13:08,470 --> 00:13:11,310 Well, I better get back to my interview with Judge Stone. 202 00:13:11,970 --> 00:13:15,710 Oh, Christine, I prefer that not everybody know my secret. 203 00:13:16,010 --> 00:13:17,970 Oh, please, absolutely. I mean... 204 00:13:18,430 --> 00:13:21,650 I think that anybody's sexual preference is nobody's business but their own. 205 00:13:22,030 --> 00:13:25,870 No, no, no. I mean about being a romance novelist. I'm quite open about being 206 00:13:25,870 --> 00:13:26,870 gay. 207 00:13:29,550 --> 00:13:30,550 Right. 208 00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:38,610 You see, there is Bodavia. 209 00:13:40,870 --> 00:13:44,670 But only way to know its true beauty is to see for yourself. 210 00:13:45,330 --> 00:13:47,090 Which brings me to next question. 211 00:13:48,360 --> 00:13:50,960 Miss Ross, will you marry me? 212 00:13:54,020 --> 00:13:56,520 I hope for your sake I didn't hear that right. 213 00:13:58,160 --> 00:14:01,540 I know my nose is not as big as my brother Vlad's. 214 00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:08,820 But I can give you big house, many sheep, and every night I will cover your 215 00:14:08,820 --> 00:14:09,820 with hickeys. 216 00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:17,040 I got a better idea. Why don't you cover one of the sheep with hickeys? 217 00:14:20,010 --> 00:14:21,390 You must have heard about Cousin Yodel. 218 00:14:24,430 --> 00:14:27,730 Dan, Dan, it's not as bad as you think. 219 00:14:28,510 --> 00:14:29,910 Yes, it is, Mac. 220 00:14:30,130 --> 00:14:34,850 Hey, he's a judge. He's clever, and I can see why a woman might like him. 221 00:14:39,410 --> 00:14:40,830 I was with him. 222 00:14:41,850 --> 00:14:45,430 He's just upset because Pamela's got a thing for Harry and not him. 223 00:14:45,710 --> 00:14:47,090 Oh, no, she doesn't, Mac. 224 00:14:47,470 --> 00:14:48,930 Trust me on this one. 225 00:14:51,300 --> 00:14:56,080 Christine, she said our arms ache to hold him and caress his sinewy body. 226 00:14:56,320 --> 00:14:57,320 Back, please. 227 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:03,060 Face it, Dan. It was right there on the tape. 228 00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:04,800 The tape? 229 00:15:04,920 --> 00:15:07,380 Yeah. It was on Harry's desk. It fell into his tape recorder. 230 00:15:07,580 --> 00:15:08,960 I had nothing to do with it. 231 00:15:10,500 --> 00:15:14,620 Oh, of course. That must be her... What? 232 00:15:14,980 --> 00:15:15,980 Nothing. 233 00:15:19,600 --> 00:15:20,459 Show something, Christine. 234 00:15:20,460 --> 00:15:21,460 No, I don't. 235 00:15:22,080 --> 00:15:23,100 Okay, yes, I do. 236 00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:26,600 I know that she definitely wasn't talking about Harry. 237 00:15:26,820 --> 00:15:27,960 But who was she talking about? 238 00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:34,520 Mia. 239 00:15:34,880 --> 00:15:35,880 Of course. 240 00:15:36,260 --> 00:15:39,780 The only reason she was playing up to Harry was to get the interview. 241 00:15:40,500 --> 00:15:43,500 Oh, Pamela, you sly little mink. 242 00:15:51,660 --> 00:15:53,960 Promise to keep this to yourself and you stay away from Pamela. 243 00:15:54,920 --> 00:15:55,920 All right, I promise. 244 00:15:56,160 --> 00:15:57,160 Spill the beans. 245 00:15:58,580 --> 00:16:02,820 She moonlights as a romance novelist. You were listening to the dictation of 246 00:16:02,820 --> 00:16:03,820 latest book. 247 00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:10,160 What? You mean that woman is into this mindless romantic drivel? 248 00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:12,640 Who's this guy with the eye patch? 249 00:16:13,180 --> 00:16:17,560 Oh, he's a former CIA agent who lost his eye while he was rescuing Angeline from 250 00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:18,560 a Colombian drug lord. 251 00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:20,840 Or so I've heard. 252 00:16:25,820 --> 00:16:26,820 It's great. 253 00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:31,300 And Harry's in there getting ready to make his big move on her. 254 00:16:32,880 --> 00:16:36,760 Oh, my gosh. He is going to make a complete fool of himself. 255 00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:38,079 Yeah. 256 00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:39,160 Life is good. 257 00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:47,020 And so, given the impersonal nature of the system, when someone comes before me 258 00:16:47,020 --> 00:16:50,260 in my court, at that moment, in an odd way, 259 00:16:50,990 --> 00:16:53,230 I am Lady Justice. 260 00:16:56,450 --> 00:17:00,490 Harry, you have such a brilliant sense of humor. I can't tell when you're 261 00:17:00,490 --> 00:17:01,510 kidding and when you're not. 262 00:17:02,530 --> 00:17:04,410 I was kidding. 263 00:17:05,150 --> 00:17:06,150 Definitely kidding. 264 00:17:07,109 --> 00:17:12,650 Yeah, I kid, because it helps me relax at the end of a long day. That's one 265 00:17:13,150 --> 00:17:15,829 Another is to play a little Mel Torme. 266 00:17:18,349 --> 00:17:19,349 You mind? 267 00:17:19,680 --> 00:17:21,319 Oh, no, no, I like Milt Ramey. 268 00:17:26,859 --> 00:17:28,200 Isn't it romantic? 269 00:17:32,580 --> 00:17:34,200 Music of the night. 270 00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:38,020 Dream... Whoops! 271 00:17:39,060 --> 00:17:40,060 Bulb must have blown. 272 00:17:41,000 --> 00:17:42,280 Hope you're not afraid of the dark. 273 00:17:43,020 --> 00:17:46,900 No, I'm not. It's just that I won't be able to see my notes very well. Well, 274 00:17:46,940 --> 00:17:49,670 then... Perhaps I can be of some assistance. 275 00:17:51,010 --> 00:17:52,010 Your Honor! 276 00:17:52,210 --> 00:17:53,210 What? 277 00:17:54,570 --> 00:17:56,970 I was wondering if you could do me a favor. 278 00:17:58,150 --> 00:17:59,150 What is it? 279 00:17:59,690 --> 00:18:01,030 I can only tell you over here. 280 00:18:06,430 --> 00:18:07,430 I'm over here. 281 00:18:08,790 --> 00:18:10,870 Trust me, sir. She doesn't like you. 282 00:18:11,950 --> 00:18:15,310 Not that it's any of your beeswax. I just so happen to know she does. 283 00:18:15,919 --> 00:18:18,920 Look, Harry, if this is important, we can always continue it tomorrow. 284 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:23,260 No, no, no, Pamela. In fact, Miss Sullivan was just ready to leave. 285 00:18:23,580 --> 00:18:24,580 Weren't you? 286 00:18:25,120 --> 00:18:29,160 Right. But first, I'd like to leave you a little note reminding you about that 287 00:18:29,160 --> 00:18:30,160 favor. 288 00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:33,460 I'm sorry about this, Pamela. We can pick up where we left off. 289 00:18:35,620 --> 00:18:36,539 There you are, sir. 290 00:18:36,540 --> 00:18:38,580 All right. Thank you very much, Miss Sullivan. 291 00:18:53,930 --> 00:18:59,930 a lesbian i thought you said it was no big deal and i firmly believe that i was 292 00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:03,410 just giving judge stone a piece of information then why did you use three 293 00:19:03,410 --> 00:19:08,310 exclamation points well i just wanted to make sure he got the message i mean you 294 00:19:08,310 --> 00:19:09,310 know how men are 295 00:19:28,300 --> 00:19:31,020 show you a love you've only dreamt of. 296 00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:33,520 Dan? 297 00:19:34,380 --> 00:19:35,380 Dan? 298 00:19:35,660 --> 00:19:36,660 What? 299 00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:50,900 Lesbian? I thought you said she was a romance writer. 300 00:19:51,420 --> 00:19:54,900 You told him? I was just trying to keep him off your back. Wait a minute. Slow 301 00:19:54,900 --> 00:19:57,260 down here. Is she a lesbian or is she a romance writer? 302 00:19:59,500 --> 00:20:00,459 She's both. 303 00:20:00,460 --> 00:20:01,600 Where do you find the time? 304 00:20:03,740 --> 00:20:07,240 Well, I mean, all that romantic stuff on the tape, it wasn't about me. 305 00:20:07,920 --> 00:20:09,620 You listened to my tape? 306 00:20:09,880 --> 00:20:11,000 Well, it was his idea. 307 00:20:11,300 --> 00:20:12,980 It was on your desk. I don't believe this. 308 00:20:13,260 --> 00:20:17,180 I thought I was coming down to a courtroom, not a junior high school. 309 00:20:17,780 --> 00:20:20,700 Well, I've got a question for you. 310 00:20:21,220 --> 00:20:24,760 Why do you get off looking like that and liking girls? 311 00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:28,640 You're supposed to wear a flannel shirt and look like... Pete Rose. 312 00:20:30,980 --> 00:20:33,440 I'd like to distance myself from that remark. 313 00:20:33,920 --> 00:20:35,080 Yeah, yeah, me too. 314 00:20:37,040 --> 00:20:38,720 I think that speaks for all of us. 315 00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:45,980 Pamela, we behaved rather badly. I think we owe you an apology. 316 00:20:46,380 --> 00:20:47,380 Oh, save it. 317 00:20:47,700 --> 00:20:51,640 You know, it would serve you right if I focused my article on your adolescent 318 00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:52,640 hijinks. 319 00:20:53,040 --> 00:20:55,720 Oh, you wouldn't really do that, would you, Pamela? 320 00:20:56,750 --> 00:20:58,230 I might be willing to make a deal. 321 00:20:59,110 --> 00:21:00,110 Okay. 322 00:21:00,530 --> 00:21:01,530 20 bucks. 323 00:21:03,430 --> 00:21:04,430 No. 324 00:21:05,110 --> 00:21:06,110 Here's the deal. 325 00:21:06,570 --> 00:21:09,910 You don't tell anybody I'm a romance novelist. 326 00:21:10,370 --> 00:21:12,410 And I won't write about what happened here today. 327 00:21:14,650 --> 00:21:18,370 Well, that sounds pretty reasonable, doesn't it? Oh, absolutely. Say no more, 328 00:21:18,430 --> 00:21:19,129 say no more. 329 00:21:19,130 --> 00:21:20,130 Good. 330 00:21:20,330 --> 00:21:21,550 And I'll be on my way. 331 00:21:23,970 --> 00:21:25,890 Well, I think we handled that pretty nightly. 332 00:21:27,080 --> 00:21:28,260 We were goon balls. 333 00:21:29,500 --> 00:21:30,620 Yeah. Yes. 334 00:21:32,140 --> 00:21:33,140 Sir? 335 00:21:35,700 --> 00:21:36,780 Oh, sir. 336 00:21:37,180 --> 00:21:41,460 Oh, go ahead and say it, Mac. I know you're dying to. It's probably all over 337 00:21:41,460 --> 00:21:44,620 building now. Everybody's snickering behind my back. 338 00:21:45,040 --> 00:21:48,580 Harry Stone turned the lights down and played Mel Torme for a lesbian. 339 00:21:51,100 --> 00:21:52,100 Huh? 340 00:21:53,440 --> 00:21:56,630 No, no. I just want to tell you the guy... from the State Department is here 341 00:21:56,630 --> 00:21:57,690 about the Conkle Brothers. 342 00:21:58,890 --> 00:21:59,890 Oh. 343 00:22:00,210 --> 00:22:01,210 Good. 344 00:22:02,150 --> 00:22:05,770 How about that other stuff? If you happen to hear it, ignore it. I don't 345 00:22:05,770 --> 00:22:07,330 how those rumors get started. 346 00:22:10,130 --> 00:22:11,250 Hi. Harry Stone. 347 00:22:11,610 --> 00:22:12,610 T. Mark Fitch. 348 00:22:12,750 --> 00:22:16,330 Acting Executive Assistant to the Vice Deputy Undersecretary for Central Balkan 349 00:22:16,330 --> 00:22:19,170 Affairs. Whoa. It's tough to get all that on a business card. 350 00:22:20,350 --> 00:22:21,810 All right. See you around the Conkle Brothers. 351 00:22:23,190 --> 00:22:26,870 Yes, and their papers check out, Stone. They are the Boldavian royal family. 352 00:22:27,270 --> 00:22:29,930 Wow. What's protocol in a situation like this? 353 00:22:30,450 --> 00:22:32,370 You throw them on a plane and ship their butts back. 354 00:22:32,690 --> 00:22:35,450 Fight! Back to fight for freedom of Boldavia! 355 00:22:36,290 --> 00:22:38,090 Fight! You don't have to fight. 356 00:22:38,330 --> 00:22:41,590 Yugoslavia kicked you out because they are tired of supporting your nation of 357 00:22:41,590 --> 00:22:42,810 obnoxious freeloaders. 358 00:22:43,630 --> 00:22:46,290 Brothers, let us sing the national anthem. 359 00:22:46,970 --> 00:22:48,430 No, that's really not necessary. 360 00:22:59,370 --> 00:23:03,110 Ah, don't worry about us. We have found a way to improve our gene pool. 361 00:23:03,570 --> 00:23:04,570 Hey! 362 00:23:04,970 --> 00:23:05,970 What was that? 363 00:23:06,050 --> 00:23:07,130 Well, Judge, got to go. 364 00:23:07,810 --> 00:23:08,810 Pleasure meeting you. 365 00:23:09,150 --> 00:23:11,730 Hey, open this damn thing up! Is that Ross? 366 00:23:12,290 --> 00:23:15,370 Couldn't be. She was napping in the veils lounge just a few minutes ago. 367 00:23:15,630 --> 00:23:18,030 Well, hope you find her. V .C. Harvey let you know.